I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
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I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
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But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I believe in your delicious
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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