Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
