god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
You're earring is so big in my mouth
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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