note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
He shit in the fireplace
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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