my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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