we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
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