im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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