I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Randomize
