last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize