And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
