is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
