Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize