She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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