my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
