dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
accomplished twins. life is a go
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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