no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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