He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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