we have officially lost it.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
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Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
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and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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