I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
