Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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