Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
