worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
