Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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