I want to stick my p in your. b.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
