I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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