East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
