I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
