Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
