So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize