it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
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I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
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You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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