Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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