And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
