question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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