he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
