So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
