I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
