im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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