Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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