Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
