How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
