Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
