And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
