what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
