oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Brb crying the tears of my youth
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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