If that was your dad, he is hot
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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