First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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