Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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