In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize