I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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