I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize